So Ryan starts a website (Web program? Service? We’re fuzzy on the terminology, but you get the gist) called “WUPHF.” This online…thingy….enables users to send messages to numerous outlets simultaneously, rather than texting and then posting to Facebook and then Twittering. For the sake of simplicity, we’re going to call this program “Woof,” because the other spelling is just plain confusing. Also, we’re obsessed with the idea of Kelly as a little puppy barking woof, woof, woof to get her boyfriend’s attention.
Ryan and his best friend/mentor/would-be lover Michael solicit investments from their coworkers, and their business proposition generates a lot of attention. The bad news? The temp talks a big game, but his funds are running super low…as in nine days from bankruptcy low. The good news? Washington University wants to buy the program for its public health department (WUPH – get it??) Nobody from the Dunder Mifflin crew is rolling in cash, so Ryan’s coworkers unanimously agree to sell the website and protect their investments. However, Ryan wants to see his baby soar, and Michael just wants to see his golden boy smile.
Ensnarled in a workplace conflict of his own, Jim learns that success comes with a price. He hits the first hot sales streak of his life, but discovers that he has reached his commission cap and can’t bring in any more money for the rest of the quarter. Here’s the obvious flaw to this system: Jim has no incentive to work. This leaves lots of time for play; unfortunately, his playmates are working and refusing to cooperate. Jerks.
Take Dwight, for instance. He’s out of the office, running his Thanksgiving-inspired attraction, “Hay Place.” And kids are dying to go to their local “Place for Hay,” where the petting zoo closes at 2:00, the goat roast follows at 3:00, and a “roll in the hay” costs five bucks. Dwight gets too caught up in the Hay Place to fulfill his contractual, ahem, requirements, to Angela, but don’t worry, she might have found a friendly widower to satisfy that need. We can’t wait to see how this storyline develops. Angela in love, for real? We swoon.
Oh yeah, we forgot to mention: Dwight crowned himself the “Hay King,” stealing the title from a bunch of eight year-old boys but delighting his inner child in the process.
Ultimately, Ryan cracks under pressure and decides to sell the website, to everyone’s relief – everyone, including Michael, who might have realized that Ryan isn’t such a stand up guy. He’s actually a selfish, lazy and image-obsessed guy, in Michael’s own words, although Michael does take a stand to support Ryan as one of his “people.”
All’s well that ends well, even for Jim, who kills the twin enemies of boredom and the Sabre system (aka Gabe) by editing one of Jo’s self-help tapes to belittle and torment Gabe for hours. And that’s what you get for being a mama’s boy.
