Two ways to let go of grudges and improve your health

We're looking at ways you can let go of grudges on this Live, Life, Well.

A North Carolina church congregation recently made the news for an act of forgiveness. A driver crossed a centerline of the road onto a sidewalk and killed the church's music director. Members are now praying for the suspect as he goes through the court system.

Unlike that case, Clinical Psychologist Dr. Jennifer Baker said many grudges involve family members. She said holding a grudge is toxic to your health.

"If you're keeping that going, your body is reacting whether you're aware of it or not," remarked Dr. Jennifer Baker of Good Dads. "It causes long term damage," she said. "It also creates a situation where it's harder for your body to heal itself."

Dr. Baker said letting go doesn't mean saying it's okay. Instead, it means you forgive because of the benefit to yourself.

One technique to help people let go of grudges could be telling yourself the other person is hurtful, but that you are bigger than that. In this case, rather than being the martyr in the story, you become the hero.

You could also write the hurt down on paper and then set fire the paper on fire.

Dr. Baker did a podcast on this topic. You'll find the link to the podcast on the right side of the webpage and at the bottom of the page on the app.